The other day I was looking through my profile pictures on Facebook. I came across one that I had posted on April 11th; it was Nick Adenhart.
My heart felt heavy as I remembered watching the news on April 10th and learning of his death. Learning about his pitching, his 1-0 record, his 6.00 ERA, and his nine strikeouts.
For some reason, on this day, his death struck me with a surplus of grief. He was a few months younger than I was and he was living his dream.
I consider myself to be on a constant spiritual quest, while I don’t claim to be religious nor believe in a god, I contemplated the most pronounced features I knew about Adenhart.
He wore number 34. Perhaps it’s a stretch, or merely coincidence, but the numbers three and four add up to seven. Being someone who once considered herself religious, I thought about the number seven and the context it had toward Adenhart, I stumbled across a website that explained it to me:
“When man began to analyze and combine numbers, he developed other interesting symbols. He took the perfect world number, four, and added it to the perfect divine number, three, and got seven, the most sacred number to the Hebrews. It was earth crowned with heaven – the four square earth plus the divine completeness of God. So we have seven expressing completeness through union of earth with heaven. This number is used more than all other numbers in the Word of God…
“The whole Word of God is founded upon the number seven. It stands for the seventh day of the creation week and speaks to the millennial rest day. It denotes completeness or perfection.”
I sat and wondered if Adenhart had thought of these things, he pitched for the Angels, his number when broken down, was considered divine. Maybe he had, maybe he hadn’t. Had he ever considered himself to be a mark of perfection? I don’t think that anyone ever considers themselves perfect, I don’t think anyone ever considers themselves divine, but had these ideas ever crossed his mind?
I pondered the man who had taken Adenhart’s life away from him, away from the Angels, away from us. Had he thought about these things? Did he think about the lives he’d impact when he got into a car with a BAC higher than 0.19? Had he considered what he’d taken away when he plead “not guilty”?
I don’t claim to have been friends with Adenhart or even have heard of him before his death; but somehow, it struck a note with me. On some level, I’d like to have the belief that Adenhart’s team and number are no coincidence, and somehow he really does represent that of an angel, maybe watching over his team; but the skeptic in me wants to dismiss it.
The key phrase is “wants to.” There was something very settling about looking at Nick’s picture that day, a calming presence that simultaneously moved me to tears. Like I said before, maybe it was coincidence, or maybe there’s something bigger. Either way, despite not knowing Adenheart, despite not hearing of him until his death, I can’t help but think of him often, linger on what might or might not be, and think that maybe, just maybe, he’s watching over me too. Maybe it wasn’t coincidence that I wrote this blog, maybe it wasn’t coincidence that his number was somehow broken down in my mind, maybe we all need an angel to believe in, maybe Nick is that Angel.
The average Rockies game contains about 20,000 to 30,000 people, probably more lately since the state of Colorado has decided to jump on the bandwagon. Of those 20,000 to 30,000 people, I represent one. I don’t expect that the Rockies or FSN will take note of the lowly asian sitting out in the Pavilion; in fact, I don’t expect really anyone to notice me out there, I blend in quite well with the blanket of Rockies t-shirts out there.
Of the, I have no idea how many, possibly thousands of blogs on MLBlogs, I represent one. One single Rockies blog in a sea of major league blogs; an average blogger whose writing is… well… average. I don’t expect to get noticed for it, although I wouldn’t mind if someone had talked to me before putting up that terrible picture of Matt Daley on the Rockies homepage.
As a fan, I suppose in reality, we don’t expect to get noticed for our fanhood. We move through the crowds, maybe hoping to catch a homerun ball here or avoid a bat flying at our head there, be apart of the greatest game on earth somehow. As much as I would like for the Rockies to say, “hey, these are some good pictures, and this is a good blog, we should’ve talked to her before putting up that picture of Matt Daley where he looks like he’s sleeping,” the reality of ever actually getting noticed is slim. After all, for each of us as an individual, we are but one fan.
One fan sitting out in the crowd, one fan writing just another blog.
However, this one fan got their five seconds of fame for ten seconds. Make sense?
On July 5th, I received a few text messages from friends saying I had just been on television. That’s right, yours truly was standing in the crowd singing “God Bless America” and was shown on television next to a rather strange looking, “maybe I should stand uncomfortably close to you” dude.
Okay, so, he wasn’t that uncomfortably close, it just looks to me like he is.
It was my five seconds of glory, which I think we all kind of expect to get one day, the five seconds of catching a ball, the five seconds of screaming on the Rockies post game show and having Tom Helmer stick the microphone out toward the crowd, the five seconds of being the only fan sitting in the stands while it’s pouring and the game is still playing.
Not that I’m letting it go to my head or anything, but it was cool to hit a bar with my friends, JENN AND MARY, and have the bartender say, “Hey! You were on TV during the Rockies game!” (Not as exciting as it sounds, it was a bar that they frequent so the bartender actually kind of knows me.)
Yes, I had my five seconds of glory being on television, but, the fun didn’t stop there for me.
On July 25th, I went to the Rockies Fan Photo Day, which was amazing!! I stood in line waiting for my friends, JENN AND MARY who, to no one’s surprise, were late… and by “no one’s surprise,” I mean mine. A girl later approached me and our conversation went something like this:
“Are you Emily from MLBlogs?”
“I read your blog!”
I was about to be really embarrassed if this was a person who had commented on my posts and I never commented on hers.
“Oh, really? Thank you so much, that’s awesome! Do you write a blog?”
“No, but I go through and read some of them.”
How did she recognize me?
It was the Garrett Atkins shirt and the Red Sox bag, my indistinguishable trademarks.
It was like one small step for me, one giant step for bloggers!
So, Emily was recognized by Emily at Fan Photo Day.
It was pretty spectacular, I was really stoked; and since Emily, I know you’ll be reading this, I really appreciate it. Thank you so much for reading, it’s greatly, greatly appreciated. I hope we meet up again at a Rockies game. Look for me in the Pavilion, that’s where I usually sit.
There it is, I had my five seconds of glory for ten seconds. The way I see it, that’s it, I’ve used mine up, so I probably won’t have any more moments of glory in my life.
With that in mind, thanks to everyone who reads my blog! I like writing them, reading and commenting on others, and getting comments. It’s cool to do.
Okay, so Rockies Fan Photo Day was AMAZING!!!
I got my picture with Garrett Atkins, as you may have noticed from my new profile picture. It went down like this:
“Oh my god, he’s coming!!!”
“You’re like… my favorite player in the majors…”
And that was it. Possibly the greatest five seconds of my life.
I expect that throughout the rest of that time, Garrett Atkins heard, “You’re my favorite player,” or “I’m your biggest fan” at least 400 times. I don’t expect that mine stuck out to him or that he would even remember me telling him. What’s important is that I know I told him, and I actually meant it. That’s not to say that no one else who met him and told him that that day didn’t mean it, but, well, I guess you all know how ridiculously crazy I am about him.
For the most part, Fan Photo Day was uneventful. It was: players come up, take a picture with you, leave. Some things to report:
Ryan Spilborghs is still elusive to me. I was so close to getting a picture with him and then the people running the event ushered him elsewhere. I couldn’t even believe that, he was like, five people away from me. It was a little heartbreaking.
I met Tom Runnells, and he was hilarious. I’d heard that he was a really nice guy from Tommy, but Runnells now sticks out in my memory. He approached and I was so excited I was like, “Tom Runnells!” And he was like, “Yes?” And I said, “Oh… nothing, I’m just excited.” So I shook his hand and he was like, “You can stop shaking my hand now,” although I wasn’t really shaking his hand anymore, he was just shaking mine and then kept joking that I wouldn’t let go of his hand, even though it was the… opposite… or… maybe you had to be there.
I accidentally stepped on Josh Fogg’s foot and had a mild freako
ut about it. It wasn’t really stepping on his foot, it was more like I kind of tripped on his foot. Anyway, he was cool about it.
My friend Jenn tripped and used Dexter Fowler’s jersey to help hold herself up. I find that far more hilarious that she used his own jersey.
I really wanted pictures with Jason Hammel, Huston Street, Todd Helton, Clint Barmes, Brad Hawpe, and Omar Quintanilla, but they are now elusive to me as well.
I have decided that I am in need of a vacation from not going to school and, until recently, unemployment. Therefore, I am headed up to New York to see my friend. I was trying to work it out so I could go to Washington DC first, but I wasn’t thrilled about the idea of heading there by myself and having to pay for my own hotel. It’s too bad airports don’t let you store stuff in lockers these days, or at least the ones in Washington DC don’t.
I curse Washington DC for not doing that because I have never been to another ballpark, let alone a ballpark that my boys are playing at! Oh well, plans didn’t work out for that, I’ll survive.
So, since DC isn’t happening, I will be headed straight to New York and once up there, straight to Boston. Up to Boston for what you might ask? A RED SOX / YANKEES GAME!!
Yes, I am going to witness the GREATEST rivalry in the history of sports. I am, in a word, stoked. I will cheer loud for the Red Sox and won’t worry about getting beat up since I’ll be in Boston. I guess the biggest concern is being in New York with my Red Sox jersey bag, maybe I’ll get beat up there. That may have sounded like I was too eager to get beaten up. Don’t be fooled, I am not eager to get beat up.
While in Boston, I hope to meet up with none other than Julia over at Julia’s Rants. It will be EPIC. As disappointed as I am that things didn’t seem to work out for DC, I’m pretty stoked to head up to New York and Boston. Any advice?
That’s my big news. I’ll leave you with Rockies pictures that I got from Fan Photo Day:
Ian Stewart:Jason Marquis:Jeff Francis:Juan Rincon:Yorvit TorrealbaMatt Daley:Jeff Francis and Seth Smith (quite possibly my favorite picture):